Because the clubbing nights with slight impressions of seeing your face in the crowd have never stopped. I’m still dancing as you are there to enjoy. I’m still picturing you with a glass of whisky standing around the bar and watching people around you. I’m always shivering when I have to go the bar to get a drink… I’m afraid you’re gonna be there and my heart will stop that very second and my eyes will never forget the looks of you and they will hurt forever. Because I’m waking up in the morning, breathing Bucharest dirty air and feeling happy knowing you might be around here somewhere. Probably you’re not, but you just might.
In the middle of all this, taken down by music, nothing to live for and the pain for the winter soon to come, I found the “instead of you”. Some years younger, energy flowing all over his body, mind focused on music and beauty of life in your twenties. I freaked out last night. In the darkness of the bedroom he looked just like you. Or am I going crazy again?
Now what? Do I have to step again to my Kristal church to get you back into my eyes or from now on it’s going to be the instead of you’s image all over my life and my dancing nights? Will you meet me in Kristal this winter?
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